Hey, I am Ashleigh the sunshine celebrant - an independent wedding celebrant who works with to-be-weds to create a sparkling ceremony that emanates them both as a couple. I weave together a story of emotion, humour and love and officiate the ceremony on your wedding day and I am rewriting the narrative that the ceremony is the boring part of the wedding. In my ceremonies we start on a high!
Gone are the days where weddings always involve a church, a sit-down meal and a DJ playing the cha cha slide. Couples are feeling more empowered to have their wedding their way and there are some gorgeous things you can do to add that personal touch.
Think about your guests
How accessible is your venue and your ceremony? And we mean in all senses of the word. What about the language that is being used? What can you do to ensure people feel safe in the space? You can talk to your celebrant about language, I will welcome everyone into the space rather than using gendered language.
I've heard sad experiences where registrars have misgendered throughout a whole ceremony. Do you want people to be asked to stand up? How about those who may not be able to do so and how that might make them feel. I love to suggest people, clap, whoop, cheer, stamp their feet and celebrate however they feel comfortable and able. Once again, I work with the couple to decide what will work in their ceremony. Can you have a cosy quiet space available for people who might feel a bit overwhelmed with the day. Not only does it make people feel more comfortable, but it is also a lovely way to show people you are thinking of them and what might improve their experience of your wedding day.
Your vows
Some people thrive at the idea of standing up in front of everyone they love and reading out their vows to their partner. Some would rather run and hide in a corner and not come out for the rest of the day. Whatever is right for you both, is the right decision. How about writing a letter to one another to exchange in private after the ceremony? You could even do it the night before the wedding day with a glass of your favourite drink, reminiscing about the previous years and thinking about what the rest of your lives may look like together. Alternatively if you are crafting some personal vows to read out on the day, these are a wonderful way to show your partner and all of your guests, what you love about each other and your promises for the future. Why don't you get someone to toss a coin or get you to pull straws to decide who will read their vows first. You can even have a quick game of rock, paper, scissors.
Getting folks involved
Folks love to feel special and involved in your wedding ceremony and will look different for each wedding. Giving guests a special job they are in charge of makes them feel part of your day and proud they have been trusted with assisting you to make sure everything goes off without a hitch. Although do consider some people may find this overwhelming, so chat to them about it! During the ceremony you can get the guests involved in lots of different ways. The wedding rings can be passed around the guests during the ceremony, so well wishes can be passed on. This is called a ring warming ritual. Group vows to commit to looking after the dog, or children or something fun like agreeing to get on the dancefloor when their favourite song comes on. A interactive quiz can be a great way for guests to interact and have some fun, but also find out some things they don't know about the couple.
Music
Take a minute to think about how certain music can make you feel. Now relate that to a wedding and how it can change the atmosphere, add excitement, emotion or top of the lungs screaming, whilst everyone hugs each other and cries at the end of the night (insert wonderwall, skater boi, 500 miles anthem here). Live music can really add something wonderful to a ceremony and doesn't always cost as much as you think it might to include this into your day. I have some really exciting music moments in ceremonies next year, that I can't wait to tell you about.
You!
The most personal thing about your wedding is you! You've seen the trends on Instagram, this year we've had lots of champagne (maybe prosecco) towers and bows everywhere. If you are into those touches, then absolutely go for it. But think about what your perfect wedding day looks like and get your partner to do the same. Are you thinking a bit of time carved out in the afternoon for a nap would be idyllic? A karaoke session might be one of your favourite ways to spend a Saturday night. The fabulous things about weddings are you can throw away the rule book and do whatever makes your heart soar. Your wedding, your way.
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